Life as a single – how to create a life you enjoy

When someone becomes single, the questions often come pretty quickly. Have you started dating? Have you met anyone? Are you on Tinder? As if being single were primarily a situation that needs to be fixed. But you might be single for a few months, several years, or for most of your life. You might actively choose to live on your own. You might long for a relationship. Or you might be very happy being single while still being open to falling in love. Either way, life is happening now. That makes the question “How do I want to live as a single person?” at least as interesting as the question “How do I find someone?”

There is, of course, no right way to be single. For some, a good single life means plenty of freedom and time to themselves. For others, having a large social circle is important. Some want to travel, go out, and constantly discover new things. Others prefer a few close relationships and plenty of peace and quiet. But there is one question worth considering: Which parts of life don’t you want to have to wait for a partner to experience? The trip you’ve been dreaming of. The restaurant you want to try. The concert. The kayaking trip. Sunday dinner. Someone to talk to when something fun has happened. When you start thinking this way, a good single life becomes less about relationship status and more about what you actually want your everyday life to look like.

One of the freedoms of being single is that you can make many decisions for yourself. At the same time, a strange paradox can arise. We can be free to do exactly what we want, yet still hold back because we don’t have anyone to do it with. You want to go to a concert, but none of your friends can make it. You want to try a new restaurant, but everyone seems busy. You’d love to go away for the weekend, but who would come with you? Eventually, other people’s calendars can start determining your own life. That doesn’t mean you have to learn to love doing everything alone. There is a third option: find more people and social settings where you can do things together. If you often find yourself thinking, “I’d love to do that, but I have no one to go with,” you can read What do you do when you have no one to do things with?.

A partner can be an important person in your life. But one person doesn’t have to be your entire social life. Friends, acquaintances, colleagues, neighbours, workout buddies, and people who share your interests can all play very different roles. Someone is the person you call when life is difficult. Someone is great to travel with. Someone always wants to go to the theatre. Someone else says yes when you suggest spontaneous after-work drinks. And some people you only see occasionally – but you’re happy every time you do. It’s easy to underestimate the value of those relationships that exist somewhere between stranger and close friend. A richer social life doesn’t necessarily mean finding ten new best friends. It can simply mean creating more natural opportunities to connect with other people. If you want to actively create more of those opportunities, you can read how to meet new people as an adult.

There’s a piece of advice single people hear quite often: “Get a hobby and maybe you’ll meet someone.” But what if we turn that idea around? Don’t get a hobby to find someone. Do something because you enjoy it. Cook Italian food. Play boule. Go kayaking. Run. Visit an art exhibition. Try padel. Go to a quiz night. Learn something new. Then the evening isn’t a failure just because you didn’t meet the love of your life. You did something you wanted to do. And at the same time, something else happens: when we do things together with other people, connections happen naturally. We talk, laugh, help each other, and discover new people without having to start with a profile picture or a formal date.

That may be one of the biggest practical barriers. You find something that looks fun. Then comes the thought: Who am I going to go with? And if no one is available, staying home suddenly feels easier. Doing things on your own can be wonderful. But you don’t have to do everything alone just because you’re single. One option is to choose settings where it’s natural to arrive on your own but where you do something together once you’re there. A course. A group activity. An organised hike. A training group. An event with a host. You arrive on your own – but you don’t have to be alone once you’re there. If taking that first step feels difficult, you can read You can come even if you’re going on your own.

At the same time, there’s no reason to romanticise single life. Sometimes it’s lonely. Maybe your friends have started families and have less time. Maybe you miss having that one obvious person to share the little things in everyday life with. Maybe your social network has changed after a separation or a move. And you can feel this way even if you generally enjoy being single. That’s a different question from how to live a good single life, which is why we’ve written separately about being single and feeling lonely – and how to create a richer social life. Missing people doesn’t automatically mean that finding a partner is the solution. Sometimes you need love. Sometimes you need friends. Sometimes you just need someone to have dinner with on Friday.

No. You can be single without actively dating. You can take a break from dating apps. You can want to meet someone without wanting to spend hours on matches and chats. You can also be perfectly happy not looking at all. That may be one of the most important distinctions between single life and dating. Single life is your life. Dating is just one of the things you may choose to do within it.

Then you don’t have to choose between building a good single life and being open to a relationship. In fact, the two can work very well together. The more social settings you’re part of, the more people you meet. And when you’re doing things you genuinely enjoy, you already have something in common to talk about. You don’t have to turn every dinner, course, or activity into a search for a partner. But you can make it possible for new people to enter your life. If a relationship is what you’re longing for, you can read how to meet someone in real life or our guide to where to meet singles.

MinglMe was created around a simple idea: there should be more ways for singles to meet than through a screen. That’s why MinglMe brings singles together around things people already enjoy doing – food, sports, culture, adventures, wellness, and social activities. You book an activity you genuinely want to join and meet other singles in a group. Everyone is single. Many come on their own. The activity gives you something natural to gather around. Sometimes you meet someone you’re curious about. Sometimes you make new connections. Sometimes you simply get to do something really fun. And that makes for a pretty good evening too. Less swiping. More real life.

You don’t have to wait for a partner to start doing more of the things you enjoy. MinglMe is The Singles Social Club – a community where singles meet through activities and experiences in real life. Do something you enjoy. Meet someone you like.